First, Second, First, Second – Yes, No, Yes, No – STOP!

Relationships are as unique as the people in them.  There are some that make complete sense as to why you’re in them and others that indicate you must have a whole box of screws loose to even remotely have your toe dipped in. Which are the most prevalent?  The latter.

Taken Man, Single Woman – pretty standard setup.  No big surprise there as to why he would stray… Yet, when you’re talking risk versus reward, just exactly what are we talking about?  This is not written to indicate that the reward is ever worth the risk and let’s be honest, being unfaithful to any degree with anyone is a shame.  Yet, time and time again… it happens.  So, when posed with the question… we must try to delve a bit deeper.

Shunned for being a single mother because 1940’s times looked bad upon you.  Sincere physical advances turned down as they are sure to come again and the ever-present… keep the situation top of mind, but, never discuss or ask about it.  It’s like a page out of an Aesop fairy tale.  NO!  It’s nothing of the sort… it’s a convoluted, creation of your own doing, Princess.

I am well aware of how you feel.  There’s no question there.  WOW – what every woman dreams to hear after writing or speaking kind words… With replies like that.. there’s sure to be another loving letter written.  No.

Brushing my hand away will eventually push it far enough down the line to non-existence.  You’ll think it’s because of someone new; however, quite the contrary, it’s a rediscovery of me.  As you’ve told me many times… women complain about the whistles until they are no more and then they complain of their disappearance.  The same can be said for expressions of love.  Sure, it can still live on forever; however, it’s far from the Mona Lisa and does not need to be displayed.  Similar to your feelings of affection.

He stays… despite her well running dry, but, that does not mean I will.  In fact… the only thing keeping me around in a lull as I continue my dream of someone – our reality is not enough.  You do care, I know…yet, that’s no different than me saying that I’m 6′ tall.. saying something, does not make it true.  One must truly be act their words in order for any truth to be found.

“I’ll call you in the morning.”  The most common of broken-promises.  Not a huge, deal-breaking item, yet, it shows a true lack of follow-through, care, commitment and concern.  One may as well say… I’ll call you when I need you. Hence my typical reply;

“That’s what I’m here for.”

I can become cavalier, despite true feelings.  I can look at someone with pure disdain despite my heart pumping, I love you, I love you, I love you…. I can walk away, never to turn back and rarely, if ever will their memory appear with any sort of joy attached.  I do this to ensure that whoever has hurt me before, is not given the same key in which to do so again.  Some would call that jaded, others would find that ability envious and yet, it happens almost automatically. It’s a blessing and a curse as there’s no turning back once those wheels are set to roll.  I can hear the the keys jiggling in the background.

Come on Over.. Welcome – Oh wait, your presence makes us both uncomfortable… What?  I get why dogs are welcome; however, where’s the Stupid Women Welcome mat?  OR Should I say Woman?  Hard to tell, one is relationship stupid, whereas the other has issues with low-flying aircraft and purchasing her own home, paying for her own vacations and pursuing her own hobbies – unless of course you’re the instructor.  Ask you.. oh, I forget, you’re accustomed to incompetent women who expect you to make their next decision or to provide them with an easier way of life… Thank you, but I would prefer to give a stranger $300 versus the toil of bothering you with what most people tend to handle on their own.

A man who revels in what I have to offer, my interests versus converting me into a female version of himself is what I am after.  He should celebrate who I am, just as I will him.  We come together with different things, unify on the core items and then expand and explore from there.  Not align on every facet.. boring!

When all is said and done… my words were genuine, my intent was without property expectation and my interest was pure; however, despite all of this, I will, for a moment show signs of wear…. I do not have to walk away, I can fade away… as well.  I have walked in and I can turn right around and walk back out.

There was really no reason to disturb me, involve me in a situation that had no real room for growth.  Yet, I get it.. what’s that saying… Women need a reason to cheat, whereas men just need a woman…. Oh, I know I played my part; however, the fairy tale of long ago is still alive and well… This is not said to anger you or dissuade you from continuing to satisfy your own needs at my expense.. it’s just to let you know that I am fully aware and cognizant of what the real rules are.. and for now, I still choose to play.  Yet, I know full well at some point, I am taking my ball and going home.  Not yet, though.. not yet.

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