serenityForgiveness – easy to ask for – perhaps, yet, hard to give.  I find myself in a third person situation; I’m not seeking forgiveness, yet, I want him to forgive her, so that perhaps we/he can move forward.  I should keep my eyes on my own paper as that is the only ‘paper’ I have control over…. do I need to spend mind-time on something that I cannot control?  Should I even worry about this – either he does it or I make my own decisions.  I sit in silence, not really knowing if I want to say something, need to or if I am choosing not to.  I have not felt like this since we’ve been together; however, in the past 24 hours it’s been a recurring thought.  I’ve picked apart small things that I may not even be aware of, if I had not stuck my nose into one item or another and then there were things that were simply in plain view that I came upon. In fact, after waiting for the proverbial shoe to drop for a while.. when it didn’t – I sort of stopped the whole worrying thing.  I’m not necessarily worried – perhaps annoyed is more like it.  Is it an annoyance that will take me from the relationship?  No; however, I’ve found myself finally at a place where I need to make some decisions regarding the questions that deserve answers.

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